Guide to being an online A-hole
by Dustin Burg 
{ Apr 30th 2007 at 10:00AM }
We've all come across them, we've all witnessed their impact, and now there is a guide to help you become one. Be what you ask ... be an online A-hole of course. The helpful crew over at GameAlmighty posted a comprehensive guide on how to become an A-hole on Xbox Live. With tips like "Curse Like a Drunken Sailor", "Blame Lag", and our personal favorite "Quit When Losing" you'll be an online A-hole in no time. Seriously, if you don't become the most hated scum of Xbox Live after reading this guide, then we're sorry to say that you're a lost cause doomed to being a respectable Xbox Live gamer for the rest of your life. So, make the jump and learn how to be an online A-hole. We believe in you.
Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
mordeux @ Apr 30th 2007 10:10AM
Me no likey the greifers.
DjDATZ @ Apr 30th 2007 10:19AM
AHAHAHAH...so gold.
another one to do that is awesomely fun and pisses ppl off ALOT is get into a game like pgr 3 (or forza 2 when it comes out) and race the opposite way of everyone and try to hit as many people as possible...and when they start bitching and whining...ask...oh wait...this isnt burnout is it? :P AHAHAHHAHA this is SOOOOO fun.
Brad @ Apr 30th 2007 10:27AM
Don't forget about using Dr. Phil soundboards.
Paul @ Apr 30th 2007 10:41AM
the one thing I HATE is when you are on a losing team in battlefield - everyone quits but you and 5 other people and the other team comes to your base - takes your vehicles - and instead of leaving just pounds the spawn points so you can move all of an inch before you are dead.
SGT Monty @ Apr 30th 2007 10:46AM
Please...they don't need any help or more a-holes to add to their ranks. This is why I think that Xbox-Live should allow age specific matchmaking. I know kids would lie, but it'd be a start. Or you could do it based on percentage of bad feedback.
AnOffday @ Apr 30th 2007 10:54AM
There are a lot of white guys on Uno who think they're black, and most of them are jerk offs too.
Chroma @ Apr 30th 2007 11:55AM
Since my roommate bought a wii with that 24wiiconnect thing always on, i'm unable to play crackdown coop simply because of the lag, so i have an excuse, err, maybe not.
Daz @ Apr 30th 2007 1:42PM
SGT Monty - I totally agree and would even pay extra to be able to use a good age filtering system!
allison @ Apr 30th 2007 2:20PM
for more info on being an ahole, check out this funny video about "smack talking":
http://www.brightcove.com/title.jsp?title=686943919&channel=428902850
me @ Apr 30th 2007 7:48PM
The worst I've witnessed:
Some guy started teamkilling because he was "bored"
F!
Clinton @ Apr 30th 2007 3:28PM
I agree with #5... a guide? I think many players out there are perfectly capable of A-hole-ness without any instruction, thank you.
j @ Apr 30th 2007 9:48PM
ahahaha my personal favourite is the so called LEGIT players who brag about not quitting match's and no Cheating/Standbying......hmmmmmm such a strong denial they must be tellin the truth hahahahaha
Tom @ May 1st 2007 6:00AM
Wooooo! Quitting While Losing FTW! [irony]
Boff @ May 1st 2007 6:16AM
I like to combine tips #2 and #4 for an added bonus.
E.G.
This fucking game is laggy as a motherfucker!
Boff @ May 1st 2007 6:18AM
But that could just be down to my limited vocabulary ;o)
Anonymous @ May 1st 2007 5:00PM
Everyone quits when losing on halo 2. We'll just barely lose a round (best out of 3 flag match) and suddenly 4 people leave. Well, there goes any chance of winning, so everyone else leaves.
I'd like to add a few thing to their list.
1. Talk in as high pitched of a voice as you can
2. Use racial slurs, even if (and especially if) the people on the other end don't fit the racial stereotype (or aren't even the same color or race) as the slur you are using
3. If you are driving a vehicle with other people in it, immediately drive it off a cliff and scream "WOOOOOOOOOO" in the microphone
4.Take the rocket launcher/energy sword/sniper rifle and then run to the enemy base and die, thus giving it to them and ruining your teams chances of victory.
Keep these things in mind, and you too will be a first class trolley A-Hole