Albionian hero spawns 537 babies, ye olde physicians baffled
by Griffin McElroy 
{ May 22nd 2009 at 12:45PM }
"We've never seen anything like it," Bowerstone physician Bloodlettin' Sam said. "It defies the small amount of science we've been able to discern."
Everyone, it seems, is at a loss for words over the unprecedentedly fruitful loins of Albionian hero "Evan1357," who, together with beloved wife Sadie the Farmer, has sired 537 children. Child Protection Services officials have been hesitant to investigate the hero ("he's just so handsome, all we want to do is marry him," they said in their defense), while Mrs. the Farmer's spirits were remarkably high, all things considered.
"People ask me how I manage to push so many human beings out of my body. The secret is to simply OOOHHHH NOOOO IIIIT'S HAPPENINIIIING AGAAAAIIN," said Mrs. the Farmer, proud mother of
Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
The Dark Wayne @ May 22nd 2009 12:53PM
what the fuck? I can't even get 4, it seems like it's stuck at 3, and he didnt even do it with multiple wives!
Rhamsey @ May 22nd 2009 2:21PM
seems like a personal problem
The Dark Wayne @ May 22nd 2009 3:07PM
I know what you are suggesting sir, and I must say I am offended.
Sub Zero @ May 22nd 2009 1:00PM
Wait for me, dad!
RedSonRising @ May 22nd 2009 1:06PM
damn, i wonder if fable 2 can even render 500+ kids at the same time. whenever i get more then 20 or 30 ppl on the screen at once it starts to slow down..
Scott @ May 22nd 2009 1:11PM
Achievement Unlocked! - You've bested Shaun Kemp!
Storm Eagle @ May 22nd 2009 2:12PM
More like "Achievement Unlocked! - The Octomom Has Nothing On Me!"
Soge @ May 22nd 2009 1:54PM
He has 511 Wifes so its just 1,..... Kids per wife.
GRegory @ May 22nd 2009 2:50PM
Way too much time on his hands.
darkbeagle @ May 22nd 2009 9:01PM
just think of the child support
jarhead906 @ May 22nd 2009 11:14PM
Barely 20 kids = 537?
I'm obviously missing something here.
SammyD @ May 23rd 2009 2:15PM
Did anybody else read "OOOHHHH NOOOO IIIIT'S HAPPENINIIIING AGAAAAIIN" in a Steven Colbert voice?
darksamus @ May 24th 2009 1:19AM
He must have drank Powerthirst!